Monday, August 5, 2013

Two Pony Gardens...for breakfast!

Lucky me...I was invited to a breakfast at Two Pony Gardens with Lisa Ringer and her daughter, Anna Hillegass, charmed visionary of Foundry Home Goods.

Beautiful August morning, lovely people, delicious food, enchanting setting. I wish I'd taken more photos. Alas, I was too busy eating my breakfast pizza!

The ingredients.

Anna, friend Ryan and Lisa Ringer, owner of Two Pony Farm and pizza maker extraordinaire!

Breakfast Pizza with onion, bacon and egg from the wood-fired pizza oven.

The Two Ponies of Two Pony Gardens

Saturday, August 3, 2013

WHAT THE F....K? Why are women so slow when they use a public restroom?

What the f...k is it about women in a public bathroom? What? How can it possibly take so long? Are they shaving their legs in there? plucking their gray hairs? What the f....k?

I was at Burch Pizza restaurant tonight and needed the restroom after many perfectly filled glasses of water and one very good margarita and I swear I stood there for several minutes, with one other woman standing there after me! I felt really bad for her because it seemed she really needed a restroom, but, hey, I did too and I'd been waiting way too long already.

I am at the point of crossing my legs and leaning against the wall trying to shed all tension from my body in an effort to de-emphasize the urge to pee.

Finally some little twit of a woman in a skirt that was way too short (had I been her mother) prances out like Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer on extremely high heels. What the f...k again...? What was she doing in there? The only difference between a man and a woman peeing is the wiping. How long does that take? And can't you just have it ready to go - there in your hand? Can't you get the toilet paper while you are peeing? Multi-task, for god's sake. There are people waiting!

The other day I was at a restaurant and there were 3 women waiting in the hall for the john and thankfully, one of them was a chef and she pointed to the men's room right there, completely empty! DUh! and said, "You can use that." So, I did.

If there is one toilet and one door that locks, what's with the Men / Women thing anyway? (or god forbid, "Gents" and "Madames.") Who cares? I share a bathroom with men at home.

But, in the end, women, get a grip. Pee. Do your primping another time, another place. People are behind you. Waiting. And definitely thinking really bad things about you. And this is not good for the species.